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Kim Kardashian put salmon sperm on her face, so I put salmon sperm on my face. Granted, she actually had salmon sperm injected into her face, whereas I had mine applied topically during a microneedling session because injecting into the skin is not FDA-approved. (Kardashian may have gotten her treatment outside of the US.) But even before the Kardashian effect kicked in, salmon sperm facials were rising in popularity—and after getting one myself, I can attest that they’re not as gross or strange as you might think.

Looking back on all of the decisions I’ve made regarding injectables and treatments, I have to say that I’ve really put myself out there as a guinea pig.

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